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HOW MOTHERHOOD HAS CHANGED ME ….

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Motherhood is the most beautiful journey in a women’s life.Its a journey that many women are either embracing or on the way or dream about embracing. Motherhood was one dream I was sure i wanted to fulfill.Being a mother is a wonderful experience,which cannot be expressed in words, you need to be a mother to know how beautiful it is…how light and happy you will feel.Being a mother changes who you are. Truly a bliss filled journey .

Motherhood is not a job nor is it a sacrifice but an honour , a privilege and mostly a blessing. I don’t believe being a mother is a non paid 24×7 job.I feel its the most selfless act  from a women.we dont actually sacrifice anything we just prioritise..even if we did we get back happiness that’s more valuable than all the sacrifices we have made for the baby.

Yes, for this child I prayed my heart out. Becoming a mother was not that easy for me. I had lots of hurdles between me and motherhood. I had two miscarriages due to cervical incompetence before having my son. Until my pregnancy I was blessed through out my life with great childhood..education..life partner..in laws…over all complete happy life…but with my pregnancy my blessings stopped.God decided to break off with me for sometime just so that i  realise how important being a mother is…After i had realised and prayed God blessed me with my rainbow baby boy who bought back all the happiness and joy in to my life. He makes me feel alive .Each day i count my blessing which is more today than yesterday and even more tomorrow than today…

Motherhood has changed me a lot. From the time my son Riaan was born i am no longer the older me.I am a lot better person than i was before(not that i was bad before).Having my son gave new meaning to my life.

The moment I heard his cry for the first time, i knew there and then my life has changed forever. I am no longer just a woman, a doctor to the world but i am a” Mommy”.Motherhood gave me this new identity which i proudly flaut…way better and achieved harder than just being a Doctor.

Motherhood has made me see life in a new perspective. I started appreciating smallest of the smallest things .Life suddenly has become worth living forever. I now want to see my son grow,his family and be there for him always.

I am a more positive person. Each day I wake up to  his big eyes,chubby cheeks, smile,giggles and my fav fluffy bum!…what more do you want to make your day happier and filled with positivity. The most amazing sound in the world is my sons infectious laughs.I don’t see the bad in anything anymore..but instead i see what i can do to make this better.

I am an abyss of patience now. This is not my find but people who surround me has described. I remember getting angry with my mom for the silliest reasons I could find. I used to get irritated for everything, but now i have so much patience.i ve learned to let go.

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Now I understand , appreciate and love my mother more. I now know what unconditional love actually means. Mothers love is so different from any other form of love .It’s so pure and makes your heart beat faster and burst with all the love.I have never had my heart filled with so much love that it ll burst anytime.When i see my son laugh or giggle my heart smiles too..its a feeling that all mothers can relate to.

Something that was gross and gag inducing is no more gross.Smell of poop or seeing a soiled diaper used to make me nauseous before i became a mother. Now it’s so normal. Now if Baby pooped,or vomited its just clean and toss.I dont even feel disgust even when i see other kids do it too.

Before motherhood I was never a children friendly. I used to find it irritating when a baby cries in a flight etc.I used to find kids naughty, fussy, stubborn and messy…but now all the children of the world has suddenly become mine. I now sympathise with the mothers and love all the kids to bits now.I find them cute, silly , adorable….

Messy and no make up is my new style mantra.  After my son was born I don remember a day i don’t sport a messy bun and no make up look..in fact i was always in this.I am a fashion and make up lover. Before motherhood i never left my house without make up.

I don’t need Jimmy Choo just any shoe is enough now. I was obsessed with   shoes or any kind of footwear collection.I used to choose my footwear according to my outfit before, but now i am always in a flip-flop be it shopping, hospital visits , park or home .Gone are the days when shoes or footwear ruled over me.

Now shopping was more about my baby. His comfort and fashion mattered. For myself its jus some dress which doesn’t flaunt my flabs will do now.Gone are the days when shopping was fun, hours long and exciting.I must have spent half of my 20s in shopping malls.Now there is no time..baby needs to sleep…he needs to be fed..he is not comfortable …all these mattered more than my attire.

Timeline has changed so much now. Before becoming a mother i could get ready and leave home in less than 15 mins time, but now i need to feed the baby, clean, cloth him, prepare his feed, pack his stuffs, take his stroller, put him in , he starts to cry …take him out …pacify .again put him in…then leave home. I can’t leave home with a baby without at least 1 hour prior notice.Now i can even shower in less than 5 minutes time…

Future is more important now. Before motherhood I used to live for the moment. Now i am concerned about budgeting  and saving money for the future…I now worry about spending unnecessarily.

Life is no longer me now. I now have a constant round the clock companion…my son. He there when I change my clothes,bathe, use the bathroom,  cook, clean, read, eat, go out, everywhere…he is with me . Now my world is him and his mine. I have no me time …but i love and enjoy the us time more.

I love moms company more than my unmarried or not yet mom friends. I can totally relate to moms,  even they find it easy with me. I have nothing to share other than my parenting stories,  my mess, my poop stories etc.I cannot imagine having to discuss my baby’s poop story with my other unmarried or not yet mom friends..they will stop seeing me .

Holidays are also baby friendly now. Before the baby it was over night decisions,  packing and we are on vacay! Now its more complex.i am no longer carefree and never take weekend trips on a whim. We need to see if climate suits the baby..travel time..place..how many days…etc etc etc.So in short less vacay or no vacay.

I am more confident and feel so beautiful inside.I don’t hide my c-section scars anymore..they are memories tattooed forever …i am proud of my stretch mark..it shows how strong and beautiful my body was to make a life and nurture it inside me.I know i am a confident and an amazing mother.

Now I dont expect people to show gratitude or appreciate my parenting ways or me spending my time and energy on the baby. I know being a mother is an invisible job.No one will appreciate or care much about me …but why bother when i know for this  sweet Lil  human, I am the only thing that’s visible.

No sleep mode is on since I became a mother. I must have hardly slept through out the night ever since..but i have no complaints…i know all these sleepless nights are worth a lot more.More than me sleeping..babys sleep is important.I am more like a mombie now.
Multitasking is my forte now.I can cook clean , baby care, eat all at the same time.I can study while holding him to sleep… I can feed a baby and post and comment on instagram at the same time..ta da….I can cook and play with him …i can catch a falling child and sip my coffee at the same time…i have perfected multitasking.

I love my life more than I did before. For the first time i am truly content.i lost myself but found a newer me that i am happier and more content with.as a mother you constantly need to search your soul for strength and learn more in the process.

This post is a part of the blog train- 2 started by Pooja Kawatra of Mums & Babies where she has brought together mothers from across the globe. Do read her blog post on How Motherhood has changed me – http://www.themumsandbabies.com/2017/09/how-motherhood-has-changed-me/ and more on the blog train here.
I want to thank Mamtha Dilip of   http://allaboutmommying.com for introducing me and I invite the lovely Disha Bandhari to board the train with me to share her valuable views on the same.
Disha is a photographer,blogger,entrepreneur and an amateur everything.Mother of an 11 month old baby girl virtually popular as #BabyHashtag .Disha is a fairly funny person but she is also her biggest critic which is why she is pretty hard on herself.Being a mum has changed her personality a lot.head over to her blog tomorrow to read how.
Read Here: http://www.hashtagdisha.wordpress.com
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BABY SLEEP TRAINING STEPS AND TIPS

Do you have sleepless nights with your baby?Does your baby have trouble in sleeping? Well who doesn’t have? All moms especially new moms know exactly what i am talking about. Here are some of the things i followed to get some sleep myself and my baby to have a routine and full night undisturbed sleep.Sleep is my spirit animal and i cant even dream of losing it over my baby..ter r so many books on how to put a baby to sleep around 50 million of them i guess..i really don’t know how that phrase “sleep like a baby” came up…really? seriously?

If you are like me, you would have probably researched all possible parenting resources to get your baby to sleep well .Welcome to” Less Sleep But SleepLover Parents Club”.

When my son was born, I didn’t know anything about making my baby sleep, thank god in India we are with our moms after delivery until three months.But everything changed after i shifted back with my hubby .That very night i called my mom , she advised me to rock the baby in my arms until he would drift off…it was easy in the beginning  then things started to change, i would rock him for 30 mins to get him to nap for 30 minutes!It was so exhausting and my back started giving away. This is when i started reading baby sleep books, talked to my friends about it but all ended up in rocking the baby to sleep thing.This method was not possible for me anymore as my back pain increased and i was getting angry every time i tried to make him sleep..so i started trying different methods to get him to sleep.Then finally at around his 5th month i had a routine which helped.

These are the few steps i followed to get my baby to sleep full night

Step1

Let ur baby distinguish day and night:

Let some rays inside your room during day sleep.Babies who sleep in natural light during day adapt faster to the 24 hour time cycle than those who sleep in artificial indoor lights.

Step 2

Watch for baby sleep cues:

like yawning, rubbing ears or eyes, slower movements, crying, too clingy, etc

Step 3

Stop tiptoeing around

Go ahead with your routine  work and do not reduce voice or make the house noise proof. by going about your normal day baby starts to get used to the fact that daytime is activity time, while night is rest time{this doesnt mean that u should have a rock concert at home when baby is asleep}.

Step 4

Dim lights at night

By three to four months babies produce sleep hormones, so with lights on makes it difficult for them to fall asleep as light can suppress the hormones.So atleast two hours before bedtime reduce babys light exposure.Its healtheist for babies to sleep in complete darkness, but its advisable to put a dim nursery light just to keep an eye on the baby at night.

Step 5

Establish a routine.

This will make it easier for you and the baby  on the long run.Establish the same routine, start with the same thing, same order everyday. Once the baby gets the hang of this, baby will himself or herself start preparing to sleep at the same time. I have penned down the Tips to bedtime routine below.

Step 6

Teach baby to self soothe.

Whether you like to rock the baby to sleep or sing lullabies put them to bed at night when baby is drowsy and almost sleepy and not when they are fully active. If baby starts crying whisper long shhhh sound in the ear, rhythmically but lightly pat him on the upper back, still baby doesn’t calm , then pick up the baby, soothe until drowsy,then put down. Repeat previous steps if necessary until baby is asleep.

Step7

Be Consistent

Dont be discouraged if it doesnt work right away.Stick to the routine.give this method time to work and i am sure it will.Once this is established both baby and you wil have undisturbed good night sleep.

BEDTIME ROUTINE FOR A BABY

  1. GIVE A BATH
  2. READ BOOKS OR BED TIME STORIES
  3. LISTEN TO SOOTHING MUSIC
  4. BREASTFEED OR FEED THE BABY
  5. GIVE BABY A MASSAGE
  6. SPEND TIME CUDDLING OR ROCKING
  7. SING LULLABIES 
  8. CHANGE TO NIGHT DIAPERS AND PAJAMAS
  9. WIPE GUMS OR BRUSH TEETH
  10. SAY GOODNIGHT
  11. SAY PRAYERS

HOPE THIS HELPS ALL MOMMIES HAVING A ROUGH TIME THROUGH THE EARLY BABY DAYS.